This Thrifted Life

Now that the news of our impending kiddo is spreading, the advice lines are blazing. We had actually been researching and discussing parenting long before we made plans to have a child, and we have some pretty strong beliefs when it comes to raising kids. Most of the advice we have been given so far has actually centered around products we simply must buy for the baby, so we simply smile and say thank you. And then we make plans to do without. I know this advice is given with good intentions, but I’m a little appalled that so much of it is about expensive baby products rather than actual parenting advice. According to plenty of parenting gurus today, I must’ve had a horrid childhood because I sure didn’t have all the necessary accoutrements kids today “need.”

Are you a bad parent if you buy your kids all sorts of toys or spend lots of money on their birthdays? No. Are you a bad parent if you don’t do those things? NO.

I did not have lots of baby toys. I played with basic household items, boxes, a few stuffed animals, and our cat. I didn’t have a playard; my mom put me on a blanket and watched me as I scooted around. I had a ball.

We did not buy name brands, and we bought little convenience food. Generic cereal was the norm, and it was rarely a sugary cereal. We shared one 2-liter of soda a week, and any junk foods–like cookies in our lunch box–were strictly rationed so we didn’t have sugar overload. To this day I am thankful for the healthy food I was raised on.

Clothes were handmade, hand-me-downs,  or bought on super clearance. My mom is an excellent seamstress and quilter, so she bought fabric on sale and then made lots of our clothes. And we were always excited when we got new bags of hand-me-downs from older friends–lots of new looks to put together! I took this habit to heart: when I went to my high school prom, I wanted to do an old-fashioned Audrey Hepburn look. I found a beautiful dress, heels, gloves, bag, and jewelry (including hair combs) all for less than $100 total. Now that I thrift more than I did back then, I could probably do this for way less today. But when all my friends were spending $200 and up on just the dress, I simply thought they were insane.

I did not have birthday parties every year. There was no way my parents could afford a big birthday bash each year for lots of our friends, so we only got parties on “special” birthdays like 13. Every other year, my mom took a few friends and me out to a fun lunch; later we would celebrate at home with dessert. I have very fond memories of each of these birthdays.

I was not given expensive items right when they hit stores, and I never got a cell phone. I used my mom’s old 80’s camera until I was 16 or so. I still have most of those pictures, and they turned out just fine thankyouverymuch. I used a cassette player until I was 14 or so when cd players finally become affordable enough to be given as Christmas gifts. I never had a television in my room as a child; I got a very small one for my 17th birthday, and it was used until the day it was struck by lightning last year. I was never given a cell phone; I got myself one when I was 17 and was sure I could afford the monthly bill. These are habits that have really stuck with me: I don’t even have an ipod (I must be the last person on earth) and never spend much on tech. I prefer waiting on hand-me-downs or gifts and then using them til they’re dead.

My childhood was not austere; it was filled with books, games, crafts, and fun. What it was not filled with was extra stuff. I hope to keep my home and my child’s life free of junk and stuffed with love.

Frugal Babe has talked extensively about how little they’ve really needed for their one year old so far. You can check out some great posts here, here, and here.